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In the story of the prodigal son, what might have been the father's reaction if the returning son had proceeded to maintain that he had done nothing wrong and that he had been "led by God" to take the money and leave? What if the son had returned with male and female "partners"? In other words, what if the son just came back and was completely unrepentent - what then?
That is such an excellent question - I certainly know many families wrestling with this issue! Additionally, in our culture the prodigal is often mentally ill to some degree (probably a consequence of our ailing food supply and too much television and, in one case, post-adoptive emotional issues), making reasoning very difficult. What then indeed?
One family I know who is making progress with their prodigal in this situation has established a "you are welcome in our home, but the rules are still...", putting some boundaries around the behavior permitted, although the standard is not quite as high as the pre-prodigal days. They are also requiring church attendance as a prerequisite to being part of the family (and their church is one gifted in welcoming and accepting their child where she's at -- an unusual church indeed).
Finally, they are trying to minister whole-heartedly to the friends their child has made - many of them very lost and much more appreciative of the blessing of being loved and accepted by a "normal family", something their own child takes for granted. For example, one boyfriend had his very first "Real Thanksgiving" in their home and was completely speechless at the amount of food, finally asking "I can have whatever I want?!"
And, as the friends reveal their need, something in the prodigal is touched. My friends were astonished to see their unrepentant prodigal nonetheless leading her brokenhearted friends in prayer!
Perhaps, looking at the prodigal as a potential Cornelius, opening the door to a whole unreached community is possible. The prodigal ends up being part of a household of faith that is reaching out, and is gradually stabilizing in her own life.
So, here, Forgiveness means walking out the road back into the kingdom with the child, accepting that they have come home before they really had their pig encounter, and trusting that God will yet bring them to their senses.
Blessings to you, Glory to Him Laurie Ann
-------------------- You & Me and Jesus. We are enough!
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D- I don't believe the son would have returned home unrepentant. I think fear of his father's response and pride would have kept him away. Notice what finally "pulled" him homeward.
quote: 17"When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! 18I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. 19I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.' 20So he got up and went to his father.
This son had hit bottom so hard that there was no scheming in his motive. He had a strong desire to partake of his father's table even if only as a hired servant.
We all need to come through this experience. And should. As the song sings, "Nothing in my hand I bring, only to thy cross I cling."
If the child did return home unrepentant then is the parent obliged to receive them? Look at the case of Aaron and his two sons. He was afraid to express displeasure in their actions because he wanted to win their favor. But instead they saw their father as weak and undeserving of their respect. We know the final outcome of his lack of firmness. Of course, this began at an early age, but Aaron could have still controlled the Lord's service and those who officiated in that service. He could have reprimanded his sons and removed them from office.
A parent who tolerates a child's actions only to win their friendship may be misleading the child to believe that their condition isn't so bad after all. There needs to be compassion for their weakness but a gentle firmness intolerant of evil must prevail in the end. Do we allow unmarried children to cohabit in our house? Do we allow them to drink, smoke, or do drugs? Do we allow most anything just to keep them close to us? What message does that give--to their siblings, the neighbors, the church family?
I don't believe we can draw any conclusion that God in His great mercy would consider sharing a servant with Satan. While God is continually drawing us to Him He does not force us to serve Him. But neither can He cooperate with Satan in a joint leadership role. We must be totally His or not at all. A person who clings to one sin, and will not relinquish it--though he be ever so good--is still under control of Satan nevertheless. And this one sin may prove to be his downfall in the end.
If the contemplation of God's great love for man is not deterrent enough to cause men to forsake their sins then there is nothing on earth left to remove their iniquity from them. The work is not accomplished by anything we can do but is rather the work of the Holy Spirit impressing upon the minds of men the goodness and mercy of God in the sacrifice of His Son. Thus, we do not repent with godly repentance of our own accord. This repentance is evoked from a broken and contrite heart broken by the love of God. Our love is reciprocal.
Our love for God will be inversely proportional to our comprehension of our debt which He is willing to forgive. The greater our debt the greater our love to Him that forgives that debt. Sometimes we are tempted to self-righteously proclaim, "My sins are not as bad as what's-his-names." In this we rob ourselves of a greater appreciation for the cross of Christ. We need to look again at the perfect law of God and understand our true condition. Then we can more greatly appreciate the mercy of God.
I know that you are a very forgiving person, yourself. It still saddens me to remember how cruelly you were treated on the unmoderated HCTalk-2 list prior to its eventual self-destruction. One person after another lined up to kick you, to hiss, and to spit. One guy used x-rated language, I recall.
You are a truly a credit to the Old Dominion, Jeff! I suppose you've forgotten all that stuff... have you? If you have, I should too. I guess that's been 5 or 6 years ago, now. Not sure.
No doubt, the returning son in this story was truly repentent. I was just playing "what if" as I have seen many young adults leave home too soon only to return with no remorse for the damage done and resources misspent. I hope I never have to experience it as a parent.
Too bad that every returning backslider cannot be a repentent one.
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