The same thing applies to communion. Forget how it's "always done" and how others do it! Take the early Christian church as your example and guideline.

Sincerely,
Derrick

Maybe another question might be concerning chapter and verse for the religious side of marriage.

Most states have a simple policy quite similar to God's (imagine...). If a religious body bestows the right to perform a marriage to a member, and if that member then performs a wedding, it is legal (and religious one would hope!). Since both man and God honor such things, is there anything wrong with holding a marriage ceremony that honors God and the committment before the other members, rather than at a civil office?

Thank you all for your answers.
About weddings... I think God allows us quite a bit of freedom in our walk. The nation of Israel has quite a tradition surrounding their wedding celebrations. Many things (like the canopy -- "His banner over me is love") have Biblical significance or point to God. Our present day ceremonies began in Rome but have changed quite a bit from those first days.

OT listings show the wedding feast followed by the man joining the woman in her tent (like Jacob with both Leah and Rachel). Jesus attended a wedding feast where he turned the water into wine (first recorded miracle in the Gospel of John).

Paul tells us that one man holds one day above others unto the Lord. Likewise, another man holds all days equally as unto the Lord. Whether or not you have "religious ceremonies", your decision should be made as unto the Lord.

I personally like weddings and would love to see my daughter married under a canopy. If I had known about the custom when my husband and I were married, I would have requested to be married under a canopy.

Our wedding held a traditional vow giving and ring giving and receiving, but it also held a sermon relating the marriage of man and woman to Christ and His bride, the church. The sermon also contained a Gospel message since my parents and brother and Bruce's father and soon to be step mother were not saved (they were the only family that attended our wedding).

My marriage certificate is signed by the Pastor that lead the ceremony and contains the words, "By the power invested in me by the state of Georgia...". If not ordained, how do you have "power" by the state? Anyone have any ideas?

In most states, when a congregation formally recognizes someone in their midst as licensed, ordained, or acknowledged specifically as having the responsibility to marry, the state simply accepts that without question (the positive side of church/state separation).

If you are near a plymouth brethren congregation (usually the word "chapel" in the church name for the group that will talk to you), have someone ask them what they do. Plymouth brethren do not recognize a formal ordained clergy, but they do recognize some with a simple letter on church letterhead acknowledging them and adding whatever specific words a state may require, and that is sufficient. Your house group can do the same.

http://uaci.net/

http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Bluffs/2063/baoframesb.html

I received the following article a few months ago and thought it would be very helpful on this forum. Would appreciate your responses!

Bruce

5 Reasons Why Christians Should Not Obtain a State Marriage License
by Pastor Matt Trewhella
Every year thousands of Christians amble down to their local county courthouse and obtain a marriage license from the State in order to marry their future spouse. They do this unquestioningly. They do it because their pastor has told them to go get one, and besides, "everybody else gets one."
This pamphlet attempts to answer the question - why should we not get one?
1. The definition of a "license" demands that we not obtain one to marry. Black’s Law Dictionary defines "license" as, "The permission by competent authority to do an act which without such permission, would be illegal." We need to ask ourselves- why should it be illegal to marry without the State’s permission? More importantly, why should we need the State’s permission to participate in something which God instituted (Gen. 2:18-24)? We should not need the State’s permission to marry nor should we grovel before state officials to seek it. What if you apply and the State says "no"? You must understand that the authority to license implies the power to prohibit. A license by definition "confers a right" to do something. The State cannot grant the right to marry. It is a God-given right.
2. When you marry with a marriage license, you grant the State jurisdiction over your marriage. When you marry with a marriage license, your marriage is a creature of the State. It is a corporation of the State! Therefore, they have jurisdiction over your marriage including the fruit of your marriage. What is the fruit of your marriage? Your children and every piece of property you own. There is plenty of case law in American jurisprudence which declares this to be true.
In 1993, parents were upset here in Wisconsin because a test was being administered to their children in the government schools which was very invasive of the family’s privacy. When parents complained, they were shocked by the school bureaucrats who informed them that their children were required to take the test by law and that they would have to take the test because they (the government school) had jurisdiction over their children. When parents asked the bureaucrats what gave them jurisdiction, the bureaucrats answered, "your marriage license and their birth certificates." Judicially, and in increasing fashion, practically, your state marriage license has far-reaching implications.
3. When you marry with a marriage license, you place yourself under a body of law which is immoral. By obtaining a marriage license, you place yourself under the jurisdiction of Family Court which is governed by unbiblical and immoral laws. Under these laws, you can divorce for any reason. Often, the courts side with the spouse who is in rebellion to God, and castigates the spouse who remains faithful by ordering him or her not to speak about the Bible or other matters of faith when present with the children.
As a minister, I cannot in good conscience perform a marriage which would place people under this immoral body of laws. I also cannot marry someone with a marriage license because to do so I have to act as an agent of the State! I would have to sign the marriage license, and I would have to mail it into the State. Given the State’s demand to usurp the place of God and family regarding marriage, and given it’s unbiblical, immoral laws to govern marriage, it would be an act of treason for me to do so.
4. The marriage license invades and removes God-given parental authority. When you read the Bible, you see that God intended for children to have their father’s blessing regarding whom they married. Daughters were to be given in marriage by their fathers (Dt. 22:16; Ex. 22:17; I Cor. 7:38). We have a vestige of this in our culture today in that the father takes his daughter to the front of the altar and the minister asks, "Who gives this woman to be married to this man?"
Historically, there was no requirement to obtain a marriage license in colonial America. When you read the laws of the colonies and then the states, you see only two requirements for marriage. First, you had to obtain your parents permission to marry, and second, you had to post public notice of the marriage 5-15 days before the ceremony.
Notice you had to obtain your parents permission. Back then you saw godly government displayed in that the State recognized the parents authority by demanding that the parents permission be obtained. Today, the all-encompassing ungodly State demands that their permission be obtained to marry.
By issuing marriage licenses, the State is saying, "You don’t need your parents permission, you need our permission." If parents are opposed to their child’s marrying a certain person and refuse to give their permission, the child can do an end run around the parents authority by obtaining the State’s permission, and marry anyway. This is an invasion and removal of God-given parental authority by the State.
5. When you marry with a marriage license, you are like a polygamist. From the State’s point of view, when you marry with a marriage license, you are not just marrying your spouse, but you are also marrying the State.
The most blatant declaration of this fact that I have ever found is a brochure entitled "With This Ring I Thee Wed." It is found in county courthouses across Ohio where people go to obtain their marriage licenses. It is published by the Ohio State Bar Association. The opening paragraph under the subtitle "Marriage Vows" states, "Actually, when you repeat your marriage vows you enter into a legal contract. There are three parties to that contract. 1.You; 2. Your husband or wife, as the case may be; and 3. the State of Ohio."
See, the State and the lawyers know that when you marry with a marriage license, you are not just marrying your spouse, you are marrying the State! You are like a polygamist! You are not just making a vow to your spouse, but you are making a vow to the State and your spouse. You are also giving undue jurisdiction to the State.
When Does the State Have Jurisdiction Over a Marriage?
God intended the State to have jurisdiction over a marriage for two reasons - 1). in the case of divorce, and 2). when crimes are committed i.e., adultery, bigamy. etc. Unfortunately, the State now allows divorce for any reason, and it does not prosecute for adultery.
In either case, divorce or crime, a marriage license is not necessary for the courts to determine whether a marriage existed or not. What is needed are witnesses. This is why you have a best man and a maid of honor. They should sign the marriage certificate in your family Bible, and the wedding day guest book should be kept.
Marriage was instituted by God, therefore it is a God-given right. According to Scripture, it is to be governed by the family, and the State only has jurisdiction in the cases of divorce or crime.
History of Marriage Licenses in America
George Washington was married without a marriage license. Abraham Lincoln was married without a marriage license. So, how did we come to this place in America where marriage licenses are issued?
Historically, all the states in America had laws outlawing the marriage of blacks and whites. In the mid-1800’s, certain states began allowing interracial marriages or miscegenation as long as those marrying received a license from the state. In other words they had to receive permission to do an act which without such permission would have been illegal.
Blacks Law Dictionary points to this historical fact when it defines "marriage license" as, "A license or permission granted by public authority to persons who intend to intermarry." "Intermarry" is defined in Black’s Law Dictionary as, "Miscegenation; mixed or interracial marriages."
Give the State an inch and they will take a 100 miles (or as one elderly woman once said to me "10,000 miles.") Not long after these licenses were issued, some states began requiring all people who marry to obtain a marriage license. In 1923, the Federal Government established the Uniform Marriage and Marriage License Act (they later established the Uniform Marriage and Divorce Act). By 1929, every state in the Union had adopted marriage license laws.
What Should We Do?
Christian couples should not be marrying with State marriage licenses, nor should ministers be marrying people with State marriage licenses. Some have said to me, "If someone is married without a marriage license, then they aren’t really married." Given the fact that states may soon legalize same-sex marriages, we need to ask ourselves, "If a man and a man marry with a State marriage license, and a man and woman marry without a State marriage license - who’s really married? Is it the two men with a marriage license, or the man and woman without a marriage license? In reality, this contention that people are not really married unless they obtain a marriage license simply reveals how Statist we are in our thinking. We need to think biblically.
You should not have to obtain a license from the State to marry someone anymore than you should have to obtain a license from the State to be a parent, which some in academic and legislative circles are currently pushing to be made law.
When I marry a couple, I always buy them a Family Bible which contains birth and death records, and a marriage certificate. We record the marriage in the Family Bible. What’s recorded in a Family Bible will stand up as legal evidence in any court of law in America. Both George Washington and Abraham Lincoln were married without a marriage license. They simply recorded their marriages in their Family Bibles. So should we.
(Pastor Trewhella has been marrying couples without marriage licenses for ten years. Many other pastors also refuse to marry couples with State marriage licenses.
This pamphlet is not comprehensive in scope. Rather, the purpose of this pamphlet is to make you think and give you a starting point to do further study of your own. If you would like an audio sermon regarding this matter, just send a gift of at least five dollars in cash to: Mercy Seat Christian Church 10240 W. National Ave. PMB #129 Milwaukee, Wisconsin 53227.
www.mercyseat.net)

World Christianship Ministries
http://www.wcm.org

Universal Life Church
http://www.ulc.org

Hope these help

Rev. CD
Las Vegas

------------------

I read the word "should" as allowing anyone in a position of minister to perform the ceremony. COnsidering that we are all in the "Priesthood of the Believer" then any CHristian "should" be able to fulfill this requirement.

Welcome to the House church Interchange! Regarding your post, I'm not sure what your question is. Also, could you elaborate a little more on your observation regarding separation of church and state and the significance of that idea?

Scripturally, marriage and "performing wedding ceremonies" never had anything to do with church or state! As far as scripture is concerned, I know of no priest in Israel who "tied the knot". In new covenant churches, performing of weddings did not seem to have any part in the mandate of the church as a gathered company, nor a function of church leaders!

Rather, irt seems to me marriage was always seen by Biblical writers as a family matter. Is it possible we need to recognize the separation of family responsibilities from church responsibilities and church church responsibilities from state responsibilities?

Traditionally when families have neglected their God-given responsibilities (for example, child training and instruction in the scriptures), the church has shouldered that responsibility to such an extent (for example: Sunday schools and a wide variety of "children's ministries") that parents now feel that scriptural instruction of their children is indeed the responsibility of the church!! Also, when the church has neglected its' God given responsibilities (for example: care of widows, the elderly etc who have no family to care for them) the state has assumed that responsibility with social security, old age pensions etc etc. Now we have come to depend so much on the state for such things that we assume that that is one of the reasons government exists! But, in fact, we (as families and churches) have been very negligent of God-given responsibilities!

Well this is just a perspective I wanted to add here, but would like to hear you elaborate a little more on your perspective.