We have settled into a core group of about 8, and typically have 10 to 15 all together (with visitors). Up to this point, all in attendance have been adults (and fairly mature believers). But, for the last two weeks, we've had a VERY young Christian lady (single mom) come with her two boys (ages 7 and 9). The problem is... these kids are BAD! They won't be part of the group and insist on roaming around the house. They won't obey their mother, and are downright ignorant to her! We tried everything we could think of to include them with our group, but all attempts were in vain. We even tried to have some "activity time" with them in the back yard (kicking a soccer ball around and stuff like that), but they were bored withing seconds. We've tried putting them into a room with an adult with some activities to do, but unless we tie them up, or lock the doors and windows, they won't stay there for more than a few minutes. They just do what they want, and when they want it!

We finally had to come to the conclusion that if we were going to have any kind of meeting at all, we'd have to just let them "roam" the house on their own. They didn't really seem to get into any trouble, but it was obvious that they were only happy when they were on their own, and free of all attempts to have them join in. Of course, the reasons for their behavior are many and varied, and boiled down, are just a matter of their mother doing a lousy job in their upbringing. But, that was in her "former" life, and although she's experiencing a "new life" now, the sins of her past haunt her greatly. And now we, as a group, suffer too.

Certainly the boys behavior can be corrected over time, but my question is... what do we do until then? Should we devote all the group's time and efforts into correcting the ways of these kids? Certainly, this young mother needs help. But helping, in this case, is a monumental task!

And, besides the problem of these kids consuming all of our time, they have become a lesson to us in patience, love, kindness, etc. Maybe that's why they've been sent to us. Maybe God is testing our resolve in dealing with them.

Well, maybe you all can help. Any ideas as to how we can deal with this problem? And, believe me, I don't like calling children a "problem", and I can tell you that our group is made up of some of the most kind, patient, and loving people I've ever known. But, these kids make us angry! Please help!

Thanks,

Your understanding of her situation and your concern for her as well as your concern for the ongoing ministry of your gathering (notwithstanding the anger and frustration that arises) is to be highly commended! I have been considering your request the last few days and have been praying about it and for you all and thus have not responded right away.

The more I think about your situation, the more I perceive that God has ALREADY granted the wisdom that you need! Often, He does not remove a trial/difficulty until He has accomplished the work that He intended to accomplish when He brought that very trial into our experience. If I could simply encourage you with this: I'm sure you know this and it won't be anything new to you or the others of your group, but God is not at all surprised or annoyed with the "problem" He has permitted or even sent or possibly tailored specificly for you all! Everything which he allows to come into our experience, He has a definite purpose to use it to accomplish His ultimate goal of conforming us to the image of His lovely Son.

Could I just encourage you to continue what I'm sure you have been doing much of as a result of this situation: PRAYING and CRYING OUT to God for the answer, the grace, the wisdom, the patience or whatever it is that He knows that you need. I too will continue to pray for you all that as Christ is formed in you, and in the young Mom whom He has brought among you that the Spirit of God will have liberty to do a work of conviction, and transformation in the hearts of the two youngsters. He is able!

I love to look at Eph.3:20 in this way:
-He IS,
-He is ABLE,
-He is able to DO ALL THAT WE ASK,
-He is able to do all that we ask or THINK,
-He is able to do ABOVE all that we ask or think,
-He is able to do ABUNDANTLY above all that we ask or think,
-He is able to do EXCEEDING abundantly above all that we ask or think,
-He is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think ACCORDING TO THE POWER THAT WORKETH IN US (the very power that raised the Lord Jesus from the dead!)

Keep looking

D

O

W

To update the "situation"... this past Sunday evening, we gathered as usual, for the Lord's supper and fellowship. We numbered 9 adults and 3 youngsters. The young mother I spoke of was there, along with her two boys. But, this time one of the other women in the group brought her 14 year old daughter who was blessed to be able to help out by keeping an eye on the "boys". And actually, the boys were much better behaved this time (I think the "newness" of the first visit prompted them to act so poorly). They all stayed with the group through dinner and for about an hour afterward. But boredom set in, and the boys and the young lady went out to the back yard and played, of all things, in my grandson's sandbox. All in all, it was a stark contrast to the previous week. I'm sure much "crying out" to God had a lot to do with it (more like... EVERYTHING to do with it!). The young mother is becoming a solid part of our group, and we are blessed by her immensely.

And from the same meeting, I have an amazing praise report! A young man who visited us for the first time that night committed his life to Christ! There was a joyous shout! Angels danced in heaven! God poured out His love on this young man and gave him the gift of life! Of course, he will need much discipling, and encouragement. One of the elders in our group offered to be this fellow's "big brother" and committed to be there for him! Glory to God! What a wonderful Father we have!

As to the house church gatherings, there is much interest in the neighborhood about what's going on here, and the Christian community seems to be in quite an uproar over it! For the most part, it's negative stuff! But they can say what they want... I don't care! I've seen God move in our group more in a few months than I have in 20 years of the IC. Churchgoers REPENT! Am I becoming a radical? Have we gone off the deep end? Where's our covering? You're not part of ANY denomination? It seems like the secular community is more open to, and interested in, our gatherings than the IC folks! When I try to explain things to the IC'ers, it's like I have the plague. "Yes, that's very interesting, but I have to go now." Or, they just stand there and smile like a Moonie or something. Well, maybe I am becoming a radical. But isn't it better to be radical for Jesus than part of an audience for a professional church "production"? Well, anyway, I (or better, we) are "on fire" and nothing is going to put us out.

Sorry to go so long here, and sorry for all the exclamation points (I get carried away sometimes), but the Spirit moved me to share these things.

God Bless you all!

Andre Crouch's song "Through it All" comes to mind:

I've had many tears and sorrows,
I've had questions for tomorrow,
There've been times I didn't know right from wrong,
But in every situation
God gave blessed consolation
That my trials only came to make me strong!

I thank God for the mountains
And I thank Hin for the valleys
And I thank Him for the storms He's brought me through,
For if I'd never had a problem
I wouldn't know that God could solve them
I wouldn't know what faith in God could do!

Through it all, through it all,
I've learned to trust in Jesus'
I've learned to trust in God.
Through it all, through it all,
I've learned to depend upon His Word!

I have no doubt that God has great things in store to do in and through the gathering that only He can put together in your home! Praise God!